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Unsatisfactory Sex-Life...is an Important Reason for People to Go For “Extra-Marital Relations” or “Divorces”
Introduction
In a Country where using the word “Sex” itself is a big taboo; where anyone talking anything below belt is consider as a “Character Less” person, how can one talk about “ Love Making”? I agree that ours is a country which gave to this world “the art of love making” through pictorial presentation of “KAMASUTRA” but we still hesitate and feel shy, when one is asked to explain those positions. Just look into your “Sex Life” and see if what you are doing in “Love Making” or it is just a “Lust”? Are you having “fun” while making-love or you are just “inviting in” or “inserting in” as “fire” there is not bearable?
This article is prepared with the inputs from 467 people across the country and out-of them around 287 where females and among them 261 had experienced “Love-Making”. Most of these ladies did mentioned that in their married life...it is just “Roll-on; Roll-Off and Sleep”. There is no doubt that “Physical Relations” are important for the long-lasting “love-relations” between couple. Unsatisfactory Sex Life can lead to “Extra-Marital Relations” or “Divorces”. Lets discuss about it. Why “Love-Making” is important? What is the importance of “Foreplay” is satisfactory “Love Intercourse”. After the game is over, what is that a male or female expects from each other? And things like that. Lets being with “KAMASUTRA”.
History...behind KAMASUTRA
The KAMASUTRA history leads us back to the ancient India, between the 1st and 6th centuries (although the exact year of its writing still unknown). Considered by many specialists as the most important and influent book on the human sexuality, the KAMASUTRA (which was actually written by Vatsyayana, a scholar on Indian traditions) is today commonly mistaken as a plain and simple compendium of sex positions, or a manual to the art of sex. Other than that, the KAMASUTRA is a real document of an important part of Indian customs and traditions, showing many thoughts and ideas that still fit in our today's society values.
There are, indeed, descriptions and paintings of sex positions on the original KAMASUTRA. The author Vatsyayana regarded lovemaking as being much more than physical encounter, but also an important spiritual act of love and learning, a "divine union" as the author refers on the book. He considered that there were only eight possible sex positions, multiplied by eight. The total amount of 64 sex positions being called "The 64 Arts".
However, only about 20% of the KAMASUTRA was dedicated to sex positions, and the rest is in fact a compendium on insights about the relationships between men and women and in the ancient India's social and religious life.
The KAMASUTRA only reached the Eastern civilization in 1883, thanks to Sir Richard Burton, who wrote the first English translation for the book. Since then, other two key translations from the original KAMASUTRA in Sanskrit were made: one in 1970 by Indra Sinha and the most recent one by Wendy Doniger in 2002. However, we may find plenty of "unofficial" translations focusing only on the sex positions (and including several positions not listed on the original), specially on the Internet. Most of these versions have little in common with the original KAMASUTRA.
KAMASUTRA in its true Sense
For many people – especially in the Western world - KAMASUTRA is merely a collection of different love-making positions, a combination of acrobatics and pornography. But for the Eastern mind, the true meaning of KAMASUTRA reaches beyond this purely physical interpretation. For them, sex – in all of its forms - is sacred. It reproduces the ultimate creative act, the union of the masculine and the feminine cosmic principles. Sex is the cause of the creation and manifestation of the universe. According to Tantra, sexual intercourse, however trivial it may seem, is sacred, cosmic (even when the lovers do not acknowledge this fact, which is usually the case).
When doing the asanas (the yoga positions adopted for the ritual), tantra seeks to "divinize" the couple and their sexuality. Without this spiritual element, KAMASUTRA and Koka Shastrano wouldn't evoke divine rituals.
These two treatises aim to increase sensual voluptuousness. To this end, they propose several sex techniques, with a focus on love-making positions. In fact, the asanas, or traditional positions for joint meditation, are specific and scarce.
Tao teachers have chosen the most comfortable positions for prolonging intercourse, sometimes even up to two hours without having to move much, for this would hinder interiorization during divine intercourse. They are usually so comfortable that complete physical and mental relaxation is achieved, and alternative consciousness levels, or even sleep, can be reached. The asanas must also favor magnetic interchange of vital energy, and facilitate control over ejaculation and the body's health.
Tantra dismisses (at least at the beginning) the most common position used in the Western world - the so-called "missionary position" (Uttana bandka in Sanskrit), in which the man lies over the woman. This position is rejected by Tao followers because it does not facilitate control.
Famous Love-Making Positions
Genital Sex:
-Missionary Sex Position: The most famous and common position: man on top and woman at the bottom, with her legs spread, there is direct penetration;
-Feet on his shoulders Sexual Position: While man is kneeling, the woman rests her legs on his shoulders;
From Behind:
-Leapfrog Sex Position: It looks like the doggy position, but here, the woman's torso is lower;
-Spread-Eagle Sex Position: While the woman is laid and facing down, the man must be on top;
Woman on Top:
-Cowgirl Sexual Position: With the man lying down on his back, the woman sits on top facing him;
-Reverse Cowgirl Sex Position: The same as above, but in this position the woman faces away;
Sitting and Kneeling: -Black Bee Sexual Position: The man sits on the floor with her hands behind him. The woman sits on top, with her hands on his shoulders;
-Watching the Game Sex Position: Man sits in a chair and the woman sits on top of him, face-to-face;
Standing: -Wheelbarrow Sexual Position: The woman must be lifted by something, so the man penetrates her, standing;
-Stand and Carry Sex Position: While the man, standing, holds the woman, she wraps her legs around his waist and holds on his shoulders.
What is Foreplay and what is its importance in “Satisfactory” Love-Making
Foreplay consists of sexually stimulating activities that usually lead to intercourse. Since it generally takes women longer to physically become ready for intercourse, foreplay is important in ensuring that the female partner will find lovemaking as satisfying as the male. As foreplay intensifies and a woman becomes increasingly sexually excited, she experiences physiological changes: The labia gradually become swollen and turn a deeper color of pink, the vagina secretes a lubricating fluid that makes insertion of the penis easier, and her nipples harden. For a man, foreplay generally strengthens an erection and increases the urge to have intercourse and ejaculate.
Some Basic Techniques Considered as Foreplay are :
Kissing and deep kissing on the mouth and across the body
Stroking the erogenous zones
Fondling the breasts
Nipple stimulation and sucking
Sensual massage
Frottage (rubbing) and digital manipulation of genitals
Oral sex
Strip tease
Lap dance
Body painting
Showering together
Use of vibrators and other sex toys
There is no time limit to foreplay. And some couples routinely engage in foreplay that does not lead to intercourse and ejaculation. However, most consider foreplay the appetizer and intercourse the main course.
In any relationship where sex is involved, foreplay can be almost as important as if not necessary for the actual sex act to occur. Technically I think of foreplay as any activity that occurs as a precursor to the sex act that has the intent of increasing the level of excitement in your partner and yourself or for preparing one another for the sex act.
After discussing about “KAMASUTRA”...”Various Positions involved” in love-making...and importance of “Foreplay” ...lets share what male or female want from each other...after sexual intercourse
Most of the people just sleep over without even asking their partners as how they feel or what they want. As a result they feel dejected and hurt. So, what males like after sex?
After asking many a man what he likes to do after making love, taking a nap topped the list by a landslide, and having a snack came in at second. Now, in a man's ideal world, every woman would get up after lovemaking, prepare a warm snack for her man and then stroke his hair while he takes a long nap. And although there are women out there who do comply with such a request, chances are it won't become the post-sex routine you're hoping for. It just ain't going to happen. Relationships are about give and take, and while giving her an orgasm and taking a nap fit the rhetoric, that's not the way it's going to be.
Recent statistics released by the University of Chicago also reveal an important fact: Married men, and not their single counterparts, are the most physically and emotionally fulfilled when it comes to sex. They say that the feelings of sharing have never been stronger than in the moments that follow sex.
Which isn't to say that both men and women don't complain of spouses who get out of bed too quickly to wash up, or go back to chores, or turn on the TV, or roll over and fall asleep. They just want to talk about each other...not about their kids or relatives etc. It should both of them.
For many men, the loss of an erection after sex can also beckon the loss of a bond, a shrinking and even shirking away. Want some useless words of advice? Try not to take it personally. If your husband's haste to jump out of bed upsets you, therapists recommend looking at the act of lovemaking as a process that can start as early as dressing for dinner and not conclude until you're both emotionally ready to end your intimacy. The word postcoital implies there's something that happens before and something that happens after, and that there is an it. All there is is a whole.
Now, what is that a female want after “Sexual Intercourse”? I can't pretend to know what every single one wants after sex. The desires range from cuddling and talking to being left alone and being fed. But from what I could gather, touching definitely topped the list.
They want to cuddle. It's no secret; just about every woman loves it when her man finishes doing his thing only to flip her around and hug her in the spoon position. That's the goldmine of affectionate actions. Flipping her around isn't even necessary, but chances are that some kind of bodily touching may be. Why? Well, because sharing in a very sacred experience with a woman likely leaves her feeling vulnerable. And something as small as wrapping your arm around her can make all the difference.
They want to talk. Although many guys aren't big fans of the "cuddle," there are even less men around who want to talk once the deed is over. But if she wants to talk, you may have to keep your ears open and listen up. Chances are that she will likely talk about what went down -- especially if you had her yelling out like a banshee. And I'm quite sure that your "stork able" ego will overtake your need for some shuteye when it comes to such a topic anyway.
She may pamper you by saying, “Let's do it again”. If she's still raring to go after the first round, chances are she'll be all over you, doing her best to let you know that the evening call for a second round. Between playing with herself and stroking your penis, you may just find yourself going into round two before you know it. But if you're older and more comfortable in your relationship, chances are that you may not be as easily aroused for round two, and, of course, that isn't your fault. Add that to the fact that you probably did all the work and it's quite possible that your little man won't be good to go right away.
Conclusion
“Love-Making” is a process. There is a beginning...there is Delivery and then there is an end. More than “just” physical, it is an emotional bonding. And let me tell you, if people are going for “Extra-Marital Relations” one of the main reason for that is “Unsatisfactory” Sexual Relations. Even law says that unsatisfactory “sex relations” is a valid reason for divorce. You can make your love life interesting and enjoyable...you just need “imagination” or “innovation”.
Have a “enjoyable” and “fun filled” life. Always be together and love each other.
Looking forward to your comments and feedback.
With lots of love and care
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Impotence may have a physical, lifestyle, or psychological cause. An underlying medical condition is the most common cause of impotence. Such conditions may interfere with the blood supply to the penis, the generation of nerve impulses involved in getting and maintaining an erection.
Some medical conditions that commonly cause impotence include diabetes, cardiovascular disease, atherosclerosis, or the hardening of the arteries, kidney disease, and diseases affecting the nervous system. Diabetes causes damage to both blood vessels and nerves. Cardiovascular and other vascular diseases reduce the flow of blood to the penis, and the veins that remove blood from the engorged penis may be leaky. Kidney disease may cause impotence through chemical changes that affect circulating hormones, blood supply, nerves and overall energy. Conditions that affect the brain or nerves, such as stroke, Alzheimer’s disease, or multiple sclerosis may all interfere with the flow of nerve impulses that are needed for an erection.
Besides medical conditions, surgery that involves the bladder or prostate and pelvic and spinal cord injuries may affect nerves supplying the penis or involved in maintaining an erection. Certain hormonal imbalances such as low testosterone levels can also cause impotence and several types of prescription drugs can cause impotence as a side effect.
Lifestyle factors implicated in impotence are lack of physical exercise, being overweight, and the use of alcohol, smoking and illegal drugs. Alcohol and tobacco cause damage to blood vessels and nerves. Lifestyle factors may exist alone or be accompanied by psychological factors such as depression.
Psychological causes of impotence include stress, anxiety, depression, or guilt. Sometimes, people who have been physically or sexually abused may suffer from psychological impotence. Another cause of psychological impotence is confusion about one’s sexual identity. Often, someone with an underlying physical condition may also be depressed or anxious, adding to the combination of factors causing impotence.
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The word 'Mother' is synonymous with care, love and all good things on the earth. However, smoking mothers can be inadvertently killing and maiming their children – born and unborn. Shocked? It's true. Smoking mothers are potentially gifting their children with lung cancer and many other similarly devastating diseases through second hand smoke. Pregnant women harm their unborn babies directly in the womb.
Besides the above horrifying facts, here are more unsettling reasons to bear in mind when smoking. It will not only interfere with your health, it will also interfere with the health of your unborn child:
1. First of all, smoking makes it hard to conceive. Reports show that fertility in both men and women are heavily affected by smoking. In women, smoking interferes with the egg movement toward the fallopian tubes as well as the hormones that are produced during pregnancy; while in men, it lowers the semen count, and the motility of the sperm. In many cases smoking also affects the shape of the sperm making it incapable of penetrating the egg.
2. Children born of smoking parents potentially inherit a low fertility syndrome and suffer from a great number of infertility problems.
3. Smoking in many cases is the main cause for impotency in men as it interferes with the blood supply to the penis.
4. The baby in the womb of a pregnant smoking woman gets its nicotine addiction right from pre-birth as its blood imbibes the nicotine that the mother’s blood shares with it; hence it is more likely that when born they would become a smoker – and also contract all smoking related diseases.
5. In rare cases the placenta is directly affected by smoking causing a miscarriage of the foetus, or death in the womb.
6. Babies of smoking mothers will be most likely to be born premature and under weight.
7. Babies are also likely to have less developed vital organs than their counterparts (babies of non-smoking mothers) – there is a great likelihood that these babies have an undeveloped liver which will affect them throughout their lives.
8. The babies of pregnant smoking women have poor lung functions right from birth.
9. These babies are twice as prone to die from sudden-infant-death (SID) syndrome than the babies of non-smoking women.
10. The babies of those women who smoked 15-20 cigarettes a day are more likely to be sickly.
Any one of the above causes should be sufficient enough to make you quit smoking – if not for yourself, for your little miracle that is being formed in your womb. Read the above lines again, and then once more – is that what you want to give to your most precious creation? Would you really be comfortable thinking that you are voluntarily and consistently harming your child even before their born? These are some questions that you should to ponder seriously.
Get in touch with your doctor today and enlist his/her help to quitting smoking. You owe it to your child to be healthy and give them a healthy beginning to the start of their life. As a mother, you are the nurturing contact of the child – do not become the poison in your own child’s life.
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Most of the questions asked to sexual health experts are about men's early ejaculations and women's orgasm troubles. When you read this you may say: It's normal, if man is coming off quickly, woman couldn't have an orgasm! But if you really think for a few seconds, surprisingly, you won't see any relation between these two events. Because, a man if he is not a boor, will prepare his woman to reach her orgasm before his ejaculation.
The other highly popular question is about the penis size! After all that porn movies many people are really confused. How and where to find such a prominent organ? What is the normal size? How thick and long can be the biggest? How small is acceptable for lovemaking?
Every man's genital is different as his finger print and the role of the penis size in a happy and successful sexual relationship is not such important. At least you don't have to be such stupid to pay sack full money to programs, drugs or advice for making it bigger! Even with a huge organ a man's chance is very limited to make her achieve an orgasm if he is not a good lover and doesn't know proper sex techniques, most probably he will cause pain instead of pleasure.
Even a man who has a miniscule dick may be a perfect lover! The only way is to learn how to make better love, how to be a better partner, instead of being paranoiacly distressed. This is normal and this is your body, love it and try to use it more creatively and with more love. Kiss and caress every part of your partner's body for long time, arouse her enough, and go down and give her a nice oral love... until she reaches the climax.
Believe me, every woman loves and prefers such a talented lover in the place of a big dick entering a few times into your vagina before spurting out and then sleeping in his side as nothing happened! Naturally!
Having a small organ is not a guilt, a crime, if he knows his body and has developed many better solutions he is absolutely a CLEVER man and a perfect lover!
In regard to early ejaculations... This, also, is not a crime and if the man has not an organic disorder, may be corrected with some effort. But many men, instead of paying attention to their situation, act like early coming off doesn't make any difference in their sex life! Which may be true!
Actually you may consider the natural disharmony between two genders. Men, by their nature, want to thrust into a hole when aroused and squirt in, that's all! But woman needs a prior preparation, a foreplay of at least 10-15 minutes to be concentrated and ready for insertion.
One woman likes this position, another may choose that position, many women request clitoris stimulation besides men's thrusting... Many fatiguing services asked from men! And furthermore, if a serious and passionate relationship doesn't exist between partners, men are really exhausted in the bed. Is a natural error, an innate lack of harmony exists between men and women?
Let see some different type of early comers:
Type A: The worst. He doesn't even know he is an early comer. When he likes, he takes the woman under him and ejaculates. He doesn't care anything else! For the woman's orgasm? What is that? He hasn't heard anything about woman's orgasm!
Type B: He knows about woman's orgasm but act like he doesn't know. Same of the Type A, he pulls the woman under and he comes off, the only difference, if by mistake or pain, woman makes a weak sound like "ah" he will suppose she reached an orgasm but for his comfort, he will never ask her the truth!
Type C: He knows his disorder, he is sad and wants to visit a doctor but he is shamed or can't find the time to go! As a foreplay he kiss and caress her a little but he can't wait and comes off. Sometimes he can't even find times to thrust his dick into her. He is sad but life goes on!
Type D: He is aware of his early ejaculation disorder but he also knows his partner's orgasm right! So, he will kiss and caress her at great length, give her a great oral love and bring her to an orgasm. Then start to make love for himself and he comes off. Because his partner reached orgasm before his quick ejaculation there is no trouble. Partners are relaxed and happy!
That means, if a man is understanding and clever the early ejaculation is not an important obstacle on the way of a happy sexual relationship. Man may visit a doctor and try to find the main reason behind this disorder and get a treatment which is totally normal, but meantime he is kind and not selfish, gives her ultimate pleasures to reach her orgasm.
An absolutely good sex for a woman is a normal dick size, a foreplay at length, long kisses and caresses, staying inside her long enough with many thrusting, knowing her favorite positions and giving her the best pleasures... not insisting on what he wants, but understanding her and giving her what she needs to get her climax.
Please remember that if she has reached to one orgasm in her entire life, she knows the best position for her, and an intelligent man never insists on a new position which may cause a lack of concentration, he will follow her orientations.
Finally, what is the woman's responsibility in creating a harmonious sexual relationship? Women must talk and describe what they want clearly. Of course talking to the boors will not produce a positive result but intelligent men may understand your needs. Do not imitate orgasm or do not keep silent and sleep... talk to your lovers and kindly explain your desires, if not you will lose your sexual desires and even you won't be able to masturbate and get orgasm by yourself in the future!
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There are a number of barrier contraceptive methods available in the market. In order to make it easy for you choose the one that best suits you, let me explain the ins and outs of some of the most effective methods in this regard.
Diaphragm Diaphragm is a dome-shaped silicone or latex cup with a flexible rim. Women can use it by coating the inside and the outer edge of the diaphragm with spermicide, and inserting the same into her vagina before the intercourse. The diaphragm works effectively, as its dome covers the cervix and blocks sperm. The benefit of using the same is that it can be inserted before as much as six hours before intercourse, and can stay there for up to 24 hours.
Cervical Cap Cervical cap is a thimble-shaped silicon or latex cup with a firm round rim, smaller than a diaphragm. It also works almost the same way as diaphragm. Women can use it by coating its inside with spermicide, and inserting the same into the vagina before the intercourse. Cervical cap works by blocking sperm, as it fits snugly around the base of the cervix. Like diaphragm, women can insert it into the vagina up to six hours prior to intercourse, but it can stay there for up to 72 hours as compared to the 24 hours in case of using diaphragm.
Male Condoms Commonly known as rubbers, male condoms are Polyurethane or latex sheath that is used to cover the penis. You can also find male condoms with lubricant or spermicide added. Men can use it by placing the same on their penis before intercourse. It works by blocking the passage of sperm and eventually prevents pregnancy. The best thing with male condoms is that they do not require any prescription. These are easily available everywhere, and are an inexpensive method to provide the best protection against Sexually Transmitted Infections and HIV. However, in comparison to latex condoms, Polyurethane condoms are much better and safer. The reason is latex condoms are used with limited types of lubricants.
Female Condom Shaped like a sock with flexible rings at each end, a female condom is a soft, loose-fitting polyurethane sheath. Women can use it by placing it inside the vagina, where the ring at the closed end holds the pouch in place, while the ring at the open end remains outside. Like male condoms, the biggest advantage of using a women condom is that it effectively protects against Sexually Transmitted Infections and HIV. What is more, women can insert it up to eight hours prior to intercourse.
Spermicide Available as a gel, foam, cream, film, suppository or tablet, spermicide is a chemical that is available in different doses and concentrations and it works by killing the sperm membrane. Alone or with a vaginal barrier method, spermicide can be used either way. The biggest advantage of using the same is that it provides moderate protection from Sexually Transmitted Infections.
Now that you know some of the most effective Barrier Contraceptives, you can easily make your choice.
